I should probably be sleeping. My suitcases are in the car. My plane ticket is in my purse. And I am so, so, so, so, very excited! It all feels very surreal. Everything is so calm right now, like it should be at one in the morning. It's raining and everyone and everything is sleeping... except me of course. I watched a French movie in my last hours of living in America and got really scared because I could barely understand what they were saying without subtitles. Scratch that. I really couldn't understand what they were saying without subtitles.
In three hours, everything will change. I will get on my flight to Minnesota and then to Paris. My first host family is going to meet me at the airport. I'll be a wreck from the lack of sleep, tons of nerves, and constant plane-riding. I wonder how everything is going to play out. I keep wondering and thinking, when I should be sleeping. Will I have a mental block and forget how to speak French? Will I be so thrilled and excited to meet my family that I won't have jet lag? Will I be completely exhausted and grumpy and dizzy? Will I be able to say something? Anything?
There will be other students flying with me on both legs of the flight today. It will be interesting to see how they're doing with this craziness. The Rotary Club is sponsoring my exchange so I will be wearing a fancy blazer and be traveling with other kids in fancy blazers. I'm sorry if I'm rambling... I'm sure it will get more interesting once I arrive. It's so surreal right now like right before fireworks explode and it's really quiet and thick with anticipation. I'm so wired right now, it's ridiculous. Sleep is ridiculous. Tomorrow holds so many possibilities and I'm completely clueless about what's going to happen. I'm not sure how to feel because I don't know what to expect. Excited? Nervous? Scared? All three mushed together. I really don't want to cry in the airport tomorrow when I say goodbye to my parents. I really don't. Goodbyes are weird things. Sometimes they are too short, too long, too awkward, too sad, too unrealistic, and in my case way too realistic. It's a whole year. Starting in three hours. All right, I'm done for now. Time to lie awake and tell myself stories in French. A bientôt! :)